When I was in elementary school, I played softball. I’ll never forget the moment I was on the pitcher’s mound and caught a ball that should’ve flown past me to the girl on second base. The crowd absolutely exploded. Even writing about it now, I feel my heart rate picking up a little bit as the adrenaline kicks in from reliving that memory. It was exciting! You bet we celebrated in the moment, after the inning, and again after the game. My mom still brings it up to this day, as it was a proud moment for me and anyone who knew me.
Back then, there was no reason to question celebrating a win like that. So why do we, as adults, often feel uncomfortable cheering for the everyday victories? Especially when it comes to celebrating ourselves. I couldn't even tell you if we won that softball game; I was just able to be proud of that small (in the grand scheme of the whole game) personal win.
You might be thinking, "Maggy, you were a kid and you had a big moment...I'm an adult and we don't celebrate things like cleaning out the gutters." But what's stopping you?
In the summer of 2019, I was starting a new job and it was new hire orientation day. The Human Resources (HR) representative who was facilitating shared a piece of advice that I still use today: keep a log somewhere of the work you're doing year-round so you don't forget everything you've accomplished. She meant it in a professional context, but I've been applying it to my personal life too. Whether it’s a notebook, a spreadsheet, or the Notes app on your phone, take time to reflect on and record your wins. Include the things you accomplished, challenges you overcome, and even the positive feedback you receive along the way.
The more you celebrate your wins (big and small), the more you'll reap these five benefits: strengthen your social connections, fuel momentum and motivation, increase self-efficacy, boost self-esteem, and help your future self prepare for performance reviews.
Strengthen your social connections. As described in my introduction's softball story, my excitement was mirrored by my peers and loved ones when I caught the ball from the pitcher's mound. In the book Our New Social Life, authors Natalie Kerr and Jaime Kurtz discuss many science-backed strategies for creating meaningful connections. One of them is celebrating wins together. They explain how that genuine energy match with others leaves people feeling understood, seen, validated. In my opinion, celebrating your accomplishments with others who genuinely are excited for you is the most powerful benefit on this list. The way I see it, there is a reinforcing cycle where you deepen your social connections while you also build self-efficacy (which we'll get into more shortly).
Fuels momentum and motivation. On the days where you're not feeling good about your progress, or maybe are considering giving up on something completely, referring back to your win tracker can help combat against any negative self-talk. This also highlights why small wins along the way are as crucial to acknowledge as big ones: it's more proof of the consistent steps you've taken toward your goals. Over time, this habit trains your brain to notice success more easily. The more you feel like you're winning, the more naturally your motivation and momentum build.
Increase self-efficacy. Self-efficacy is the belief that you can accomplish a specific thing. For example, a couple of months ago I set out to learn how to fold a fitted sheet. I believed that I could learn this new skill, so my self-efficacy was high as I practiced. Just like you'd strengthen your biceps by consistently doing bicep curls in the gym, you can strengthen your self-efficacy by recognizing more of your capabilities and tracking your wins. Here’s something I encourage readers to try: when you track a win, add a column or note about which of your strengths you tapped into. Taking the time to reflect on how your personal strengths contributed to your success will also help to build self-efficacy.
Boost self-esteem. In a similar vein, self-esteem is boosted when we celebrate our wins. Not only do we believe we can do this thing, but we believe that we are overall better, more capable versions of ourselves today than we were yesterday. We increase our sense of self-worth. After six years of practicing this win-tracking ritual, it's like I have a kind of record of how my self-esteem has grown. I can see not only all the little things I've accomplished, but also who I've become along the journey.
Help your future self prepare for performance reviews. Last, but not least: your win tracker can be lifesaving ammo for performance reviews. When December rolls around and you are asked to evaluate your performance over the past year, will you be thinking of that win from February? Probably not. As humans, we are susceptible to the recency effect where we tend to recall recent events more easily than distant ones. Do your future self a favor by tracking each step along the way. You never know what's going to stand out or what patterns you'll be able to identify when it's time to reflect and advocate for yourself.
In the end, there are no downsides to tracking your wins. However, by doing so, you could strengthen your social connections, fuel momentum and motivation, increase self-efficacy, boost self-esteem, and help your future self prepare for performance reviews.